Firewood and Old Biddies

I think being on Pinterest too much is going to make my head explode. I'm at the library. Three old women were all trying to use the computer next to me at the same time, chattering away the whole time with no regard for anyone around them. The oldest one kept losing the library card. The younger one kept trying to explain to the other two how the Internet works. It was kinda funny in a sit-com sort of way. I can just see the Golden Girls doing an episode like that.  We need a version of the Big Bang Theory where all the leading characters are over 50.

I think spring is on the way. The birds in the yard are building nests. I saw a raven carrying a twig and a dove carrying straw. And the male quail are chasing the female quail around the yard. It's still cold enough to need firewood at night though. So far we've gotten by with free firewood. I'm just hoping it lasts until the cold weather quits freezing the yard up.Give it six months and I'll be whining about how horribly hot it is. I'm really not sure I'm a desert person. A dessert person maybe. Pass the cake.

Wrapping Up February

This is another milestone of blogging every day since 2013 began, both in this blog and in my Craftaday blog. So in spite of illness, financial difficulties and Internet provider failure, I've somehow managed to keep it together for two months.

Today was frustrating. Someone gave us a check to deposit. We drove 30 miles to the bank only to find out the check was filled out wrong and the bank wouldn't accept it that way. So we drove 30 miles home. This is why I want a Smart Phone so I can make deposits without leaving the house. We will save on time and gas. It wouldn't have mattered in the city when we drove by a bank branch nearly every day, but out here in the boonies, we don't have that luxury.

Not One of My Better Days

Today I was in such a funk I finally just gave up and took a nap. I wasn't planning to take a nap. I was reading a vampire story. But once I pulled the comforter up to stay warm, I was fast asleep. I'm sure I needed it. When I woke up I was able to finish the day in a productive manner, working on new art projects for Easter, which will be here before you know it.

Facebook has been depressing me. Every time I log on one of my real life friends is in dire straights with illness or accident or loss of their job. It makes me feel so helpless. One friend has blood clots. Another has a band member with brain cancer and the list goes on. A friend of my daughter's is in a coma. It makes you realize how frail life is; not a good thing to dwell on when one already has anxiety issues.

So, virtual group hug. Hope you are all safe and well tonight or will be soon.

StumbleUpon

My sister did a lot on Stumbleupon before she went missing in 2007. (See previous post). So tonight I decided to revisit Stumbleupon and see if I could figure out the appeal. I made the account years ago but didn't find it very useful. Anyway, if you want to drop by, you can find me here: http://www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Wystra/interests under the name Wystra. My sister had 4,698 likes, 4,375 comments and 665 followers, so I have a long way to go if I ever want to catch her. If you use Stumbleupon and want me to follow you, leave a comment below.  Why do you find it useful? What do you like to do on there? Is it fun? Got any tips?

Family Mystery

Having trouble with Broad Band again. It hasn't worked since about 11 AM. I finally gave in and called Virgin at 10 PM only to get a recording saying tech support closed at 9 PM. Ugh. So now I'm on dial-up.

I've been thinking about my older sister. One day she went missing and I didn't even know she used the Internet before that. Not only did he use it, she was some sort of guru who specialized in Search Engine Optimization (SEO) and had a very popular highly ranked blog. She was also an expert on horse pedigrees and breeding and owned a website called EquineInfo.com. She went by the screen name Flying Rose.  It was too late that I learned this because she vanished from her TX ranch and from the Internet entirely for about 4 years. Then out of the blue she called our aunt. We didn't even know if she was dead or alive. I personally don't have any details about what happened or why she vanished. Just another strange chapter in my family history.

Things To Do

My plans today were cancelled due to wind. So I made this list: Not sure what to do today? Call a friend who hasn't heard from you in forever. Keep a skill from getting rusty (piano, pottery, gardening, calligraphy). Play a sport instead of watching it on TV. Learn to juggle or juggle better. Do your yoga. Do something you thought only the other gender was meant to do. Hang up some mirrors. Clean your phone and light switch plates. Let your kid bang on some pots and pans for once. Groom your animals. Read old love letters. Visit a nursing home. Kiss someone. Learn the lyrics to your favorite song. Feed the birds. Watch an old movie. Try one healthy recipe. Try one not so healthy recipe. Figure out how to use your crock pot, food processor, DVD player, sewing machine, cell phone or camera. Stretch after every hour on the computer. Knit/crochet a lap blanket for a vet or women's shelter, go somewhere where no one can hear you and sing as loud as you want. Make a birthday card for a friend. Then it will be ready when they have a birthday. Order seed catalogs. Save your Altoid/Sucrets tins to sort things like bobby pins, washers, nails, rubber bands and Exacto blades in so your junk drawer will be less junky. Donate clothes you will never wear again to a thrift store. Browse Pinterest or Youtube or Intructables for great things to build. Try that interesting new hairstyle. Or you could just sit in your chair and complain that there is nothing to do.

Dust in the air from yesterday's high winds. More predicted for today.

Hilda You Are So Funny!

I just discovered the Hilda cartoons on Pinterest. How have I never seen these before? Laughing makes me cough and I'm laughing my head off. She's chubby, she's a redhead and she lives in the country. She finds herself in dilemmas like climbing a cliff when her bikini top falls off, or painting herself into a corner, or bending over to pick flowers with an old goat behind her. If you need a good old tyme chuckle check her out. Just go to Pinterest and search for Hilda.

Source: google.com via LiLy aXon on Pinterest

To Roar or Not To Roar

I've been invited to join the Lion's Club. I may or may not. This group is heavily into guns. And it all seemed kind of corny, though I like that they are altruistic. I'm Pagan, so I'm not big on their meeting starting with a prayer and the pledge of allegiance. But I think my boyfriend really wants to join. So if he does, I probably will, otherwise I'll never see him.

Two Photo Shoots

We are going out to dinner tonight so I don't want to light the fire. My fingers are like popsicles. Most of yesterday's snow has melted but it was still pretty cold today. It was 27 degrees when I got up at 7 AM and only 40 two hours later.


I still put on a handkerchief blouse for a photo shoot though. As long as I stood in the sunlight, and kept my mind on the photographer, I wasn't too cold. But as soon as we were done I changed again. I took these self-portraits. It helps me keep track of what I wear for each shoot.

Snowy Day

I've juggled a great many things but I never had the chance to juggle snowballs before. It was fun having snow, if only for a day.

Super Gusty Night

A windstorm is whipping the tarps off the truck. We had to go out there in the dark 3 times to add more ropes. Weatherunderground said there would be gusts up to 60 MPH and I believe it. I think it's going to snow though, so the tarps should be okay as long as we get the boxes unloaded before the snow melts tomorrow. My kingdom for a garage! Then we could have parked the truck inside out of the wind. I sure hope we don't get rain, but as cold as it is, I think it will be snow.

Right before bed, it started to snow.

I think it snowed all night.

3G Where Are You

After really poor connectivity with Virgin Broadband from Sat. night until now, I finally got a hold of their tech support and found out they’ve had a local outage since Sat. night and 3G browsing has been blocked until Tuesday at approximately 6:30 PM. It’s a good thing I don’t have any business deadlines right now that require Internet usage. So I’m back on dial-up until then.

Glorious Sunday

I spent a glorious day at the archery range. I didn't shoot any arrows though. I worked on stuff for my Etsy shop all day. I watched other people make bows, bowstrings, and arrows. I watched someone order 2 dozen arrows from my boyfriend and pay him by check. Then that family left. Ten minutes later their kid came running back. I figured he'd forgotten something. He went to my boyfriend and asked for the check back.

I took lots of photos and as soon as I find my camera when we unpack the truck I'll edit them and post some. But we might have to go to Midway City tomorrow. We have a stack of boxes on a friend's patio and there is 100% chance of rain at her house.  Which means we either have to go get the boxes or accept the consequences.

Abandoned House

I really want to be fit, so today my boyfriend and I took an 80 minute hike up the hill behind us. I also took a hike yesterday. I took photos when I needed to catch my breath. It startles me when my foot sinks into gopher holes. I hate that part. We hiked up to an abandoned house. It's sad when people use the desert as a trash pit. We saw discarded couches, mattresses, tires, broken TV sets, kid's playground stuff and lots of old tires.  Broken glass is everywhere.

Day in the Desert

The sun is setting in the desert after a beautiful warm day. I went for a hike up the hill. I explored an abandoned house, saw a new kind of beetle, wove my way around opuntias and chollas, and took new photos for my photography business. A relaxing sort of day.

Happy V Day

I believe instead of crying because no one makes a fuss over you on Valentine's, you should pamper yourself. So that's what I did. I bought myself some rockin' silver stilettos, some pink fishnet stockings, some radical hair dye at Sally's, and two shades of lipstick at WinCo.   I also got some candy hearts and Hershey's kisses. I really didn't spend that much money and I feel like a million bucks.

Rusty Nails

Today I watered all the yard trees and while I was waiting for the troughs to fill, I started dragging around a magnet on a string. I unearthed about 30 rusty nails, a dozen staples, some wire and other debris from the sandy yard. The wild birds enjoyed taking a bird bath around one of the trees before the water drained away. Its warm outside and cold indoors so as soon as I finish my daily blog posts, I'm going back outside to enjoy the birds.  I saw a new bird today. Smaller than a sparrow with a green tint to it's brown feathers and a little tiny red dot on top of it's head.

Yesterday's self portrait.

Bittersweet Memories

Today it was an eye opener to unpack a box that has been in storage for 14 years. So many bittersweet memories. Photos from before the divorce. Photos of pets no longer with us. Photos of pets I don't even remember having. When did we have a rabbit named Daffodil? Maybe it was a friend's rabbit.  Lots of news clippings and advertisements from when I worked as a psychic, a belly dancer, and other things.  Photos of a Renaissance Faire I danced at. Where did the life go that I once had?


Lots of mail art, both received and meant to be sent. Letters to a guy that broke my heart. Tons of jewelry from my dancing days. Stickers and stationary and old make-up. A letter from an old friend who has the same name as my grandson. Goals realized and unrealized.

People wonder why I don't go through all my boxes and get things squared away.  I don't go through them because it's heart wrenching. I still feel angry and hurt when my boyfriend's Mom said, "We'll just send Dick over there (her husband). He'll throw everything away." How callous. No one but me can decide what is important to me and worth saving. Would he even know what to do with a tarot deck? Would he know which photos were of my child's first steps or their 5th birthday party? Would he know a valuable piece of jewelry from a sentimental one and which one had more value? He's got Alzheimer's. He barely even knows where he lives so it was asinine for her to suggest sending him over. And why is she so concerned with my stuff? Hasn't she got enough to worry about taking care of him 24/7. I'm not married and I don't need a nagging mother-in-law.

A mermaid ring I found in storage.

Postoids from a long ago mail art project.

All In A Day

Today I made a list of things I could do immediately to improve my life. It was refreshing to see that there were things that I could do right now. Like laundry.

I got some great roasted garlic salsa at the local market. We had lunch at the laundromat that also included a banana, saltines and pepper jack cheese. The laundromat is next door to a grocery/hardware store which comes in handy sometimes.  I worked on my knitting while the clothes were tumbling.

I wanted to get more knitting done but we were done before you know it. It goes a lot faster with 2 people to fold clothes and schlep things in and out of the truck.

Then I had a surprise on the way home when the sky roof panel on the truck came crashing down on our heads!  I blame the bumpy dirt road and the fact that he tried to open it last Sat. and didn't get it screwed back in tight. Glad I wasn't on a freeway when that happened. Then the gasket fell down and he yelled "Snake". Very funny. Actually it was kind of funny because I'm not afraid of snakes.

Small Improvements Will Equal Big Results

Suddenly I have more confidence. My life is finally going in a direction I want it to go. I give some of that credit to Bob Parsons and his success list. I pick one or two of those each day and try to do something on it. http://www.bobparsons.me/archive_article.php?entry_id=120 
Scroll down, the list is towards the bottom.

I'm making myself slow down and get more sleep so I won't have a relapse of the cold from hell. I took a long nap. I'm tracking my eating. I'm not trying to change it yet on a conscious level. Merely being aware will do a lot towards changing it. I thought I'd just track it for a few weeks and resist the urge to feel like a failure because my eating habits are so poor. I'm pretty sure my subconscious mind will assimilate the changes over time.

I'm nourishing old friendships online. I'm adding people to my Facebook. I'm making improvements daily.

No Wonder I'm Overweight

After reading Bob Parson's 16 Rules For Success #9 'Measure everything of significance. I swear this is true. Anything that is measured and watched improves', I decided to go back to the Sparkpeople website and track my eating. It's not even 2 PM and I've consumed all but 338 of my allotted daily calories, none of which contained any fresh vegetables. Sigh. And I haven't had lunch or dinner yet.

Glorious Sunset

To say it's windy today is an understatement. I'm surprised it didn't blow my clothes right off. I did get some nice sunset photos yesterday though. I grabbed a cheeseburger at the local diner called 247. Considering there wasn't much food in the house and I didn't want to waste time or gas driving all the way to Apple Valley to go grocery shopping, it was well worth it.

Tomorrow the rocket boys will be back at the dry lake bet shooting off their model rockets if the wind calms down and it's not raining. I hope we can go watch. With both of us being sick, we didn't make any weekend plans, but I'm seriously getting cabin fever.

Smugmug

http://harper.smugmug.com/ I'm checking out smugmug and their free trial as a way to sell my photos. Anyone have an opinion of that site?

A sunset from this evening.

Next Mood Swing Is In Three Minutes

Today my emotions are all over the place. Thrilled that my daughter gave birth to a beautiful baby girl on the 4th. Anxious because so many bills are due today and we paid them by the skin of our teeth. Happy because I just rewarded my own hard work by buying an ankh from Etsy. I've searched for a long time for an ankh I liked. It's the Egyptian symbol of eternal life. Tired because I still have this cough and congestion. Ecstatic because I just found out I can handle the Second Life game with my broadband connection when I didn't think I'd be able to. Frustrated because I haven't been well enough to look for more work or do much work in my studio. Today was definitely a mixed bag of blessings.

Baby Girl

I'm having one of those 'I want to scream' Internet moments when I just can't get something that should be simple to work right. So I'm going to let that go for awhile and talk to you instead.

Today we drove all the way to Apple Valley (30 miles) to deposit one check.  Then when I got home there was another check in my mailbox. It made me think one of those cellphone with the app to deposit checks would save us some time and money.

I almost forgot to tell you my good news. My daughter just gave birth to my first granddaughter. She was born around dinner time yesterday and weighed 9 lbs. and 13 oz. I got the phone call about 7 PM and everyone on the other end sounded very happy. I'm a little jealous that my ex-husband got to be there and I didn't.  With this cold I wouldn't have gone anyway, even if I didn't live over 300 miles away.

Crossing My Fingers

I'm feeling much better today but I'm still having trouble focusing. I can't seem to stay focused on things that will earn me money. I am also very distracted by knowing my daughter may be having her baby this afternoon. The hospital released her but then the labor pains got worse, so she's going back. So I don't know if this is the big moment or another false alarm. I wish I was there. I'll have to wait for updates just like everyone else. I know it's going to be a girl and the name Emma Louise popped into my mind, though they haven't told me the name yet.

My day's been kind of mixed up. I had baked potatoes with roasted garlic and sour cream for breakfast. Then I had pancakes for lunch. So my taste buds are confused from the cold in my nose. That and we haven't gone grocery shopping since we have both been sick. I need to create some income and fast, so I hope I am well enough to focus soon.

Write a Poem

I recently joined a site called http:poetink.com and they just published my first two poems. It's a brand new site. I'm member 36 so it must have just started. And you have to submit each poem before it appears, which is good because it will keep those with ill intent from flooding the site with garbage. So if you write poetry or read poetry or both, check them out. I'm sure they can use the traffic. My name there is Red Quill, if you want to add a friend. You can submit 2 original poems per day.

The Long Awaited T-shirt

When I was leaving the grocery store parking lot, a truck cut me off. The bumper sticker said 'Life is hard. Its even harder when you are stupid.'

Hypnotic Trance Belly Dance

I had someone take a photo of me wearing my new t-shirt. When I looked at it, as usual I was disappointed. I tried to take a few more of my back. He asked what I was doing. I said, "I'm trying to take a photo of me where I don't look like a trucker."  My back looks as broad as a billboard. That's why in 99% of my photos, I only show my face. The design looks off center, but I just checked it and I'm the one that is off center.

Feeling Melancholy

Just when I'm finally getting over this cold, my lover has taken sick. I was hoping he wouldn't catch it. But he just went to bed at 8:30, which is totally unlike him. He's a guy. He doesn't want me to take care of him. He won't ask for help. When I'm sick I want all the help I can get.

I want my body back. But when I get sick, I can't exercise or even have the energy to put on make-up and fix my hair. I hate that. The Internet only makes it worse because I see all these gorgeous belly dancers and actresses and musicians. All my life I wanted that and never even came close. I've seen gorgeous women with half my talent succeed beyond my wildest dreams. I've seen their Etsy shops take off like wildfire when they are selling virtual the same thing I am. I've seen faux hypnotists with no experience whatsoever bat their big fake eyelashes and men follow behind them like drooling dogs. One former client of mine kept paying this blonde woman for hypnosis sessions on line, even though she'd never done a single session for him.  I asked him why he kept paying when obviously she was a fraud.  He said, "Have you seen her photo? She's gorgeous." Who knows if that was even her photo or one she got from a model shoot on Flickr? The whole thing is so frustrating. I thought that when I was over 30, or over 40, or over 50 I wouldn't care anymore. But I can't seem to let it go. Until I feel super successful, I'll always feel like I never lived up to my potential or got my dreams to work for me.

Dreams and Wishes

Right now I can't stop thinking about going to the Cairo Carnival on the Queen Mary. It's a belly dance extravaganza. And I also keep thinking about going to the International Juggler's Associations yearly conventions again. I stopped going to all those things when I had kids to feed and bigger things eating my life up. I'm tired of missing out on life. The question is, where am I going to generate the money to get my life back on track before I'm too old to enjoy traveling? I need to rejoin the Middle Eastern Cultural and Dance Association and the I.J.A. What you focus on gets stronger so I'm going to keep trying to get what I want.